Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Randomize
