Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Randomize