Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
drinking out of a sandbucket again
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Randomize
