In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
We were destined to go to rehab together
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
Randomize
