So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
