youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
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