I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize