My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize
