What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize