I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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