Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize