Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize