grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
