All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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