did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Randomize
