They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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