if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
