I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
