paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize