What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
