i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
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