had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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