Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
