i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
