You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize