What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
We are all done wearing pants today
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
