The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Randomize
