Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
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