If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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