'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
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