***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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