Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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