oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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