My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Randomize
