I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
