Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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