i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
He has the fingertips of a God
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
