you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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