He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
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