I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
