google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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