I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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