your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
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