Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I deserve this hangover.
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