i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize
