I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
