a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
