She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
