At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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