Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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